[playlist] to appreciate the sunrise...

[PLAYLIST] To Appreciate the Sunrise You've Got to Sit Through the Night

Sleepless Nights # 3 120 Days
Golden State Overnight Tarentel
Friend Of The Night Mogwai
Sunburn Muse
Permanent Daylight Radiohead
Silver Sun South
Midnight In A Perfect World DJ Shadow
Tommib Squarepusher
Till The Sun Turns Black Ray LaMontagne
Rain Patty Griffin
At Last Neko Case
Latter Days Over The Rhine
Dawn Begins To Creep Hammock
Sunlit Ascending The Appleseed Cast
Sunrise Cranes
The Sky Above, The Field Below Explosions In The Sky
Mountains Mix Explosions In The Sky
Oh the Glory of It All David Crowder Band
Put It Behind You {end} Keane
A New Beginning Jeremy Enigk
Been Here Before Jeremy Enigk
Glosoli Sigur Rós
Sun Stoned The Prayer Chain
Shifted Canon Paradigm Shift
Sunset Drama King The Appleseed Cast

Love

Bliss

Give Me 20

this challenge has been done on various message boards....

put your iTunes/iPod on shuffle... note the next 20 songs to play...

here's mine: completed @ 11:30am est.

Led Zeppelin - Black Dog
The Innocence Mission - Where Does the Time Go?
Explosions in the Sky - To West Texas
The Verve - Life’s An Ocean
Bruce Springsteen - All I’m Thinkin’ About
U2 - Peace on Earth
Peter Gabriel - Unlocking the Door
Caedmon’s Call - This World
Ryuichi Sakamoto - Ending Theme
Guillemots - We’re Here
The National - Secret Meeting
Boogie Down Productions - Criminal Minded
Radiohead - Let Down
Cush - The Smallest Part
Jim Gaffigan - Heaven
Hammock - Before the Celebration
Stars - Heart
DJ Shadow - Napalm Brain / Scatter Brain & Outro (Live)
Explosions in the Sky - Welcome, Ghosts
Ambulance Ltd - Heavy Lifting



does the music that plays on shuffle tell us anything about ourselves?

post your 20 below... or on your blog... or whatever...

Noticing Greatness in Others

Have you ever recognized the greatness in others? Have you then told that person that which you see in them?

my wife said something to me last nite that made me see that she saw the greatness in me. it was very meaningful. it got me to thinking, how often do we tell others about the greatness we see in them?

the next time you see greatness - tell them. i know that i have people i need to talk to - to let them know.

the beauty of it all is that God sees the greatness in us. we are not average. we are beautiful people.

enjoy: Peanut Butter Twix
and continue to check out our LENTEN BLOG.

thank you to Lilly Lewin for mentioning us in her blog post: Resources for Lent.

a season of lent

my wife + i have started a Lenten blog in which we plan on posting daily about all things related to this season of lent. i recently finished reading the book a Lenten Hobo Honeymoon
by Edward Hays. it has challenged me to look at lent as a spiritual journey... a journey in which the goal is to fall in love with Jesus all over again... at a whole new level... to reciprocate the love that God has for us.

orange lament {a.k.a. mourning the loss of a sweet friend}

apparently adults can develop food allergies later in life. at least that is what James Li says.

yesterday morning i indulged in my usual breakfast... which of course is no breakfast. but i did happen to grab a clementine or two from the fridge - to be eaten at my convenience. at my convenience - i indulged... immediately after downing two oranges - i was forced to eat a muffin from Dunkin Donuts. our secretary brought in a gun and held it to my head and made me eat a coffee cake muffin... which tasted strangely like a donut. they must fry the muffins in the same oil as the donuts.

immediately after eating, my mouth began to feel funny. the best way i could describe it is sort of a hybrid between the feeling of a sore throat - only in my mouth mixed with a strange itchy sensation with the added feeling that i had just eaten a bunch of Red Hots. I had not, in fact eaten any red hots.

deductive reasoning told me that there must have been something in the muffin that was causing such duress. the itching subsided after oh, about ten hours... or less... i lost track. it did, eventually go away.

today, for lunch i had some left over Papa Johns pizza. i gave my daughter a Clementine orange as part of her lunch. she ate half... so i, being the good father that i am - ate the other half. almost immediately i felt that same feeling as the day before.

"Ah ha!" i exclaimed! "it's gotta be the orange!"

so it appears that i am now allergic to oranges... or is it clementines? i may never know. i shall be too afraid to ever eat anything related to the lovely, delicious orange. parting is such sweet sorrow. i now know what Romeo must have felt when fair maiden Juliet was forbidden to be with him. i could take some Benadryl - but the last time i did that i was found nearly unconscious in a tent for the betterment of a day... missing out on the fun and sun and music of the Ichthus music festival.

what is the lesson learned? Don't Do Drugs.

spiritual lesson learned? Sometimes tasty, pretty things can kill you. (or at make your mouth itch)

I blame Adam.

snowblind

14 inches of snow... at least that is what i measured outside my front door. it's the most snow we've had around here in quite some time. often, after a blistering snowstorm, the cold arctic airs blows in and it's almost as if it's too cold to snow. today, the cold, dry air was bitter... single digit temperatures. the cloudless sky left us with nothing but frigid air and a bright sun magnified by the pure, white snow covering the ground.

snow blindness. the magnificent sun shines down upon a natural, earth-covered reflector blanket of snow. it can make your eyes do funky things... it can take several minutes for your eyes to adjust to the brightness and then back to any other alternative lighting.

the sun, such a beautiful object that provides so much for the inhabitants of this land - (light + warmth, nourishment, etc.) when mixed with white, pure snow becomes sort of toxic or damaging to the eyes. shielding or hiding the eyes is the only hope for relief.

sin is most often presented to us in bright + colorful ways; as a seemingly productive entity for our lives. we look at it with deceptive knowledge as if it will provide for us some sort of nourishment that will enhance our state of being. but when we surround ourselves with sin we struggle to differentiate between good + bad; light + dark; healthy + destructive. often, the extent of pain and destruction as a result of our sinful indulgence can not be noticed until later. much the same, symptoms of snow blindness don't always present themselves right away.

sin causes a sense of snow blindness. we can no longer see the sun... we can no longer see the Son.

the angel of light masks and morphs into many things... those things are nothing short of deceptive. if we take our eyes off of Jesus for even one second - we open ourselves up to a justification of actions that are not associated with Christ. we begin to look at an alternative 'light' that burns our retinas. that prolonged exposure to such a false light makes it more difficult to see the true light of Christ shining on the right path to righteousness.

there is no new revelation here. just a dangerous observation. as i hid my eyes from the extreme bright of sun + snow today, i couldn't help think about the spiritual side of being snow blind. the hard part - after giving in to temptation and being blinded by the damaging, deceptive light of sin - is crawling back into the spotlight that Christ has shown for us... even as his path is again revealed to us - our sin can be nothing short of exposed... the false light leads (ironically) to darkness - and that darkness can not stay hidden once we return to the all-encompassing light of Christ.

as lent approaches, may we all humbly walk back into the safe, warm, nurturing light of Jesus Christ. may we acknowledge defeat - and embrace victory... may we fail forward... into the arms of Jesus. His light takes away the jaundice of our sin. Fix your eyes on Him.



snow blindness

snowblind - 77's

angel of light - petra

whiter than

Things that Should Be Invented

A cake dispenser machine

A Machine that cuts your hair in your sleep

A national mermorial dedicated to the cast and crew of the movie 'The Goonies'


that's all i got so far... feel free to add your ideas...

{liner notes}

when i was in college - i attended this broadcasting convention as part of a class... i met a guy who was an album representative from a new upstart label, Gotee Records (current record label of the band Relient K). he gave me a sample disc... featuring songs from some of their debut artists. one of those artists was a band called Johnny Q. Public.
i really liked their sound... so when their debut album dropped later that summer - i snagged it with the quickness. it was (is) a great album titled Extra*Ordinary. In the liner notes, following a reprint of all lyrics and a slew of 'thank-you's', there was this final comment:



dig. be dug. and above all, peace on your head.
What does that mean?

such an obscure phrase... but i think it speaks volumes...

first of all: DIG.
Main Entry: ¹dig Pronunciation: 'dig Function: verb Inflected Form(s): dug /'d&g/; dig·ging Etymology: Middle English diggen transitive verb 1 a : to break up, turn, or loosen (as earth) with an implement b : to prepare the soil of <dig a garden> 2 a : to bring to the surface by digging : UNEARTH <dig potatoes> b : to bring to light or out of hiding <dig up facts> 3 : to hollow out or form by removing earth : EXCAVATE <dig a hole> 4 : to drive down so as to penetrate : THRUST 5 : POKE, PROD 6 a : to pay attention to : NOTICE <dig that fancy hat> b : UNDERSTAND, APPRECIATE dig the medical jargon> c : LIKE, ADMIRE dig short poetry -- David Burmester> intransitive verb 1 : to turn up, loosen, or remove earth 2 : to work hard or laboriously 3 : to advance by or as if by removing or pushing aside material

Dig means many things.
Spiritually speaking - we've gotta dig deep... deep within our soul - searching for the only thing that can fill that void in us... that God-shaped hole... that emptiness can only be fulfilled by God.












[painting by Eric Samuel Timm no1underground]


secondly: BE DUG.
"be dug." not exactly something you shout out to your friends when leaving their presence. not even proper spoken English. but what does it mean to 'be dug'? maybe it means allowing yourself to be vulnerable and exposed... to be real and honest before God... hiding nothing from the one who knows what is truly inside of us anyway...
Psalm 139:23-24 sez it like this...
Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

Be dug... maybe it also challenges us to be real with ourselves and with others. there is no room for fake plastic 'Christians' in the body of Christ. the Gospel of Jesus is truth & love & salvation. that Gospel, that good news, can not be gift wrapped and morphed into something less than real, honest, gut-wrenching truth. a sugar-coated gospel appeals to the short term craving of something that in the end will rot your soul. it does not satisfy.
be dug is to practice humility [the quality or state of being humble] before our God and all mankind.

be dug. be vulnerable. be real. allow God to search every part of you... then breathe deep the God of life.


This is what God the LORD says— he who created the heavens and stretched them out, who spread out the earth and all that comes out of it, who gives breath to its people, and life to those who walk on it...
Isaiah 42
[read more.]



[painting by Eric Samuel Timm no1underground]


finally: Peace on your head.
peace. a word eternally connected to its counterpart word... war. and yet our society reflects what is going on inside of each of us... a battle raging... the struggle to find peace and happiness... to get rid of the things that rage inside of us, tearing us apart, destroying us... our sins, struggles, temptations, memories, questions, confusion, regrets, etc... all are at war within...

only one can provide peace...God is in control. God makes his people strong. God gives his people peace. [more]


may the peace of Christ go with you. may it descend upon you like a dove. Through our digging and our being dug - may we find peace and may it rest upon our heads... [more. and more still.]


final thoughts:

lyrics from the alternative Christian band of the ages:



[band] The Prayer Chain [song] Dig Dug




It comes creepin...
Can you hear me?
Do you even know me?
I'm just like the rest
Need to stick my finger in your wrist

Dig in deep...
Can you hear my heart beat?
Do you even know my heart?
When i hold the doubts of Thomas
As hard as i hold your promise?
Dig in deep
and bury me

Let it grow

and now for something completely different

Replacing Christ?

Annointing His Feet or Serving the Poor?

in JOHN 12:1-8 Jesus is invited over for a meal with Lazarus and his sisters, Martha & Mary.
Martha served the food as Mary annointed His feet with very expensive oil. The fragrance filled the house.

Judas Iscariot - one of the disciples (the one who would betray Him) spoke up and voiced his displeasure for such an expensive being wasted in such a manner. "The perfume could have been sold and the money could have been given to the poor!"

Jesus rebukes Judas. "You always have the poor with you... you will not always have me."

Mary gave the very best - her very best to the Messiah. Honoring Him was the most important thing. Her genuineness was well received by Jesus Christ.

What a dichotomy. Give to the poor or honor the Messiah?

***

I had a discussion with some teens this week... we were talking about priorities. I asked them were God ranked among school, sports, band, work, family, friends, etc. I was asking them and about to lecture them on the importance of placing God at the top of the list - the Holy Spirit kicked me in the gut. Ever have that 'moment'? I in-turn invited them to ask me the same priority question. I admitted that at that very moment - God was not number one... my job was. I should tell you that I am a Youth Pastor. One of the girls said to me 'Your job is connected to God - how can they be separate on your list of priorities?'

We humans have the distinct ability to place anything in front of God... even ministry. I think this is why Judas is rebuked by Jesus. Noble ministry and serving others is not the most important thing - our relationship with God is! Many good deeds are done by many good people every day. Yet - those deeds do not save us - it is our honoring of the Messiah - our accepting Him - our believing that His blood takes away our sin - and our understanding that His sacrifice on the cross provides us with a bridge from death to life - a bridge to eternity with the Father above. THAT is more important than anything else - even more important than serving of the poor.

Mary understood this. I long for that kind of intimacy with Jesus. We all should.

-tim
[Alive + Kicking since '74]

A]+[K redux

ALIVE]+[KICKING

ALIVE]+[KICKING
season of change.
always real.
striving to follow.
giving my all.
living.
breathing.
kicking.
challenging.
discipling.
seeking God.

what is the next step?
red pill / blue pill
left / right
high road / low road
complacent / dust-on-my-garment
same old / new dream
creative / cre8tive





alive & kicking. simple minds. can be purchased at the iTunes store.

Best of 2006

My compilation of all things good for 2006
[now featuring 25% less typo's]

Top 25 Albums of 2006
screw trying to be hip and trendy... i went with the albums that i listened to the most...

25. Jars of Clay - Good Monsters
I've pretty much given up on most Christian music - so when CCM magazine toted Good Monsters as the best album of the year in July, I was skeptical... but i genuinely like the album and repeated listens haven't disappointed.

24. Jack Johnson - Sing-A-Longs And Lullabies For The Film Curious George
My 3 year old loves this album. It's been on repeat play in the car since March. How can I complain if my toddler is a Jack Johnson fan. The music is good and it fit the film perfectly.

23. I Love You But I Have Chosen Darkness - Fear Is On Our Side
Good album from a band with a really long name. I don't know what I liked about this CD - but I listened to it a lot.

22. Calexico - Garden Ruin
I discovered these guys via eMusic. smooth. worthy of a listen every time.

21. Neko Case - Fox Confessor Brings the Flood
Patsy Cline reborn. Great sound. Every note keeps you on the edge of your seat.

20. Sonic Youth - Rather Ripped
Don't call it a comeback. First studio album in years (7 years, i think). I love the jam in the middle of Turquoise Bay.

19. Ray LaMontagne - Till The Sun Turns Black
You get a surreal vibe when listening to this album. It's very meditative. Reflective. Thought-provoking.

18. Thom Yorke - The Eraser
Nobody knew he was working on a solo project. Computer noises and Thom's eager voice = Kid A for the 21st Century... not as good or memorable, but a nice surprise.

17. Mogwai - Zidane, A 21st Century Portrait, An Original Soundtrack
I don't know much about this album or the supposed movie/documentary about the famous head-butting French soccer stud that this scores, but I like the sounds emitted as I listen.

16. Beck - The Information
A creative album where you can decorate the CD cover with stickers and what not. The music is just as creative - which we should expect from Beck. Seeing him play on SNL in October was the stuff featuring mock puppets of him and the band and a performance featuring spoons being played at a fully set dinner table. Good. Beck is. nice name, too.

15. J Dilla - Donuts
An album made from his hospital bed - shortly before passing on, J Dilla drops 31 tracks on Donuts - mostly instrumental hip-hop beats that are nothing short of pure funk.


14. Pilate - Sell Control For Life's Speed
Another surprise hit for me. Radiohead meets Crodwed House - so sez their web site. A nice, smooth sound from this Toronto-based band.

13. Muse - Black Holes & Revelations
This got better with repeated listens. I resisted it at first - but it ranks up there with Absolution and Showbiz. Lots of hooks... catchy choruses...

12. Johnny Cash - American V: A Hundred Highways
Listening to someones last songs - you can hear the years go by with each play of American V. Cash... a legend. What else can you say?

11. Jeremy Enigk - World Waits
Sunny Day Real Estate... The Fire Theft... now a solo career? It's hard to not listen to World Waits from start to finish without being moved.

10. Fair - Best Worst-Case Scenario
I didn't realize this was Aaron Sprinkle's new band until after I had peeled away the shrinked wrapped cellophane. Memories of Poor Old Lu... This album really is a great listen... a quality production with good lyrics and instrumentation.

9. Roman Candle - The Wee Hours Revue
Paste Magazine recommended it. eMusic had it. So I snagged it and played it repeatedly. A well-crafted sound... some call it alt-country... i'd call it alternative. who cares. it's good.

8. South - Adventures in the Underground Journey to the Stars
I've always been a big fan of South... a band from the UK. This is another solid release.

7. Mutemath - s/t
The first full-length release from this energy-filled, progressive nu wave, alt-Christian, you-name-it band. I love this album... most songs are have a 5 star ranking. Listened to mostly while mowing the lawn this summer.

6. Keane - Under The Iron Sea
Rolling Stone gave this a 3 stars out of 5... so I didn't expect much when I picked up this CD... but i love it, every bit of it. Best song: Try Again.

5. Snow Patrol - Eyes Open
I'll admit that it took the season finale of ER for me to realize that Eyes Open just might be a great one... hearing Open Your Eyes as a backdrop to gunfire in the ER was chilling. I listened to that song more than any other in 2006. Chasing Cars had to be the most played song on the radio...

4. Wolfmother - s/t
This album rocks from start to finish. I listen to it a lot while running... when Woman comes on. I'm guaranteed to kick it up a notch... 70's rock with modern flair...



3. The Appleseed Cast - Peregrine
I'm a total Appleseed Cast fan-boy so i'm a little biased. so what. I had heard that Peregrine was good - but not up to the same level as Two Conversations. I found it just as good, if not better. I guess they are still categorized as emo - but I don't care... who knew something this good could come out of Lawrence, Kansas.









2. The Black Angels - Passover
it's the Doors rebirthed with more substance, less flair. It's like a time warp has taken this band back to 1960 - only instead of singing angst filled protest songs about Vietnam - they are about Iraq and other wars... oh wait, there is a song about Vietnam, too. Regardless of yours, mine or The Black Angels' political opinions, this is a nice find and a nice, solid #2 for 2006. It just rocks.





1. Mew - And the Glass Handed Kites
What kind of an album title is that? Who cares. Mew - a band from Denmark has given us the best, most creative album I've heard in years. It plays like a concept album, filled with falsetto's and melodies that'll have you humming along like it's nobodies business. 'Are you my lady, are you' is forever etched into my brain (the best hook, most melodic chorus line ever from the song The Zookeepers Boy) Tracks 5, 6 & 7 (Apocalypso, Special, The Zookeepers Boy) are the best 3 song combo on any album ever. The album even inspired me to do some creative writing...
I could listen to this album forever...it's that catchy.








Best Movie of 2006
United 93.
I couldn't tell you one name of any actor in this movie. It's gritty. It's too real. It's raw. It's life. It's the harsh reality that played out on September 11, 2001. Shot like with a documentary style, United 93 takes us through the chilling steps that led up to the eventual, supposed overtaking of hijackers, leading the plane to crash in Somerset, PA. The entire cast should win best ensemble cast at this years Screen Actors Guild. I felt like I was spying on real life events.









Best TV show of 2006
My wife decided in August that we were going to start watching Grey's Anatomy. We checked out Season One from the library and watched all 9 episodes in 2 days. We were hooked. I went out and then purchased Season 2 from Best Buy... and one week later we had watched all of season 2... just in time for season 3 to kick off in September.











Surprise Hit of 2006

A show called Ugly Betty a hit on American TV? Your must be joking. But this show is smart and funny and witty and creative. It may be the model for the 21st Century sit com... although I don't know if it would be characterized as a sit com... but it's really good.




Random stats from 2006:
Total Movies Viewed: 265 (i keep a log... you should try that, Bryan)
Most Listened to Artist (according to LASTFM stat keeping - meaning songs played on my computer - tracked online): U2 - 381
Most listened to Song: Snow Patrol - Open Your Eyes - 27 times
Best Moment: Steelers Win Super Bowl XL
Person of Interest that I'd like to See Disappear: K-Fed
Rediscovered Passion - Golf
Best Gaming System - Nintendo Wii
Books read by me: more than 5 i think... including Friday Night Lights and a bunch of Emerging Church books
Best Decision: Switching to DirecTV
Worst Decision: Waiting 2 years to get a painful wisdom tooth removed
Worst Sound: Hearing the noises involved with removing a wisdom tooth
Best Song: Mac & Cheese

macandcheese.mp3

why is it...

...that every cell phone user over the age of 50 has 'When the Saints Go Marching in' as their ring tone?

Christmas and everything after

Christmastime... a joy for all. watching our kids come down the stairs with pure joy... pure delight in their eyes... that was the best present ever. Santa was good to us, but how will he pay for it all?

i just have a few question for big Santa (not to be mistaken for Bigthana):

-why make it so difficult for us parents to unpackage a toy that 'lil boys and girls want to play with RIGHT AWAY! some toys are screwed into a piece of cardboard... others are wound so tight with industrial strength twist-ties.

-why does new plastid have that stank to it?

-does Rudolph not like apples now? we didn't get the memo.

-can you tell the elves over at Fisher Price to get on the ball? my son's FP3 isn't working right... the software wont install on my laptop... what elf is gonna help me get that straightened out?

it has been a good day, though... a good couple of days. it is always kind of sad to see the holidays come and go... it means that life now must go on. in a few short days - we'll be reflecting on the past year - as well as looking towards the future that lies ahead.

alas - let us not forget the miracle of the Saviors birth for which this time has been set aside to remember. Baby Jesus, Mary & Jopesh (as Micah calls him), the shepherds, animals in the barn, the wise men... seeking the child messiah... the savior of the world. born a lowly birth - becoming all parts man - and yet still all parts God. what a wonderful day it was 2000 years ago. frankly glorious.

Rejoice!

Hope defined.

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

nevermind.

i watched VH1 Classic's series Classic Albums last nite... the album was Nirvana's Nevermind, recorded in 1991.

the band recorded most of the album in Los Angeles - because record execs from DGC wanted to keep an eye on things. When the band was in LA, they stayed at the Oakwood Apartments on Barham Blvd. 5 years later - i would reside in that same apartment complex while attending Film School. I can only wonder what apartment Nirvana stayed in... maybe it was mine...

Nevermind is one of the greatest albums of all time. Watching Classic Albums makes me appreciate it even more.

Over the Rhine in concert

last Tuesday, i took my wife to see Over the Rhine in concert @ the Kent Stage in Kent, Ohio. We have had many opportunities to see them and everytime something interfered. This time, we made time for OtR and we are both glad we did.

The show started at just about 10 past 8. There was no opening act... just Over the Rhine...



Karin Bergquist - vocals, guitar, shaker
Linford Detweiler - keyboards, guitar, vocals
with...
Jake Bradley - acoustic and electric bass
Mickey Grimm - drums, percussion

they played for 2 solid hours... mostly Christmas stuff from their new Christmas CD titled Snow Angels that has just released. They also played 4 or 5 songs from an album that is in the works and, acording to Linford, will be released in 2007, titled The Trumpet Child. The new stuff was phenominal...

There was a nice atmosphere at the Kent Stage. it was an intimate show... a full house of approx. 750 people. Hearing Karin's vocals in person was amazing. Her voice... her style is exceptional. And Linford is no slouch himself, playing the piano, hammond b-3 organ, accordian & guitar. it was a tight show with a jazzy feel. The smell of coffee filled the venue - as OtR was brewing & selling their own unique blend. We walked away with joy in our hearts and a few OtR cd's ta' boot.

Here is the set list... 21 songs... 2 encores...
Fever
Born
White Horse
Darlin' (Christmas Is Coming)
Little Town
I Don't Wanna Waste Your Time
Nothing Is Innocent Now
The Trumpet Child
Who Am I Kidding?
All I Ever Get For Christmas Is Blue
North Pole Man
Goodbye Charles
Snowed In With You
Snow Angel
Trouble
Orphan Girl
Drunkard's Prayer

First Encore:
Baby It's Cold Outside
Jack's Valentine

Second Encore:
If A Song Could Be President
All I Need Is Everything

extraction

bottom left wisdom tooth (i.e. #17) has left the building.

i only had to get one wisdom tooth removed - not that there is any less pain or anything. but it is out - and i am left with an empty feeling, lots of swelling and a jaw that still can hardly open.

a brief history of how said events went down:

Feb 2, 2005: Tim chips a tooth on a crouton at the Golden Corral while celebrating a birthday meal with the in-laws.

August 2005: Tooth hurts. Tim buys Ambesol.

Feb 2, 2006: Tim celebrates another birthday and the one year anniversary of chipping #17.

June 2006: Tooth hurts "real bad"

July 2006: Pain disipates.

Day before Thanksgiving 2006: Tim wakes up in the middle of the night in extreme pain. Jen says "have you given birth to two children? You don't know pain." Rolls over and goes to sleep.

Nov 30, 2006: Tim gets ner a wink of sleep... sez he'll call dentist in morning if tooth pain persists.

Dec 1, 2006: Pain subsizes. Tim goes to Wooster.

Dec 2, 2006: worst.pain.ever. its a Saturday. what dentist is open on a Saturday... during Christmas shopping season? Nadda. Calls dentists emergency number... ordered to take 800mg of Advil. Appointment set for Monday @ Noon.

Dec 4, 2006: Tim sees an old friend from high school at dentists office. is greeted with a smile. Gets in the chair. Dr. Sales falls off his when he sees the work of art that is #17.

Dec 4, 2006: 3pm appointment with Dr. Johnson, Oral Surgeon - to get #17 removed from the premisis.

3:15... three needles of novacaine. ouch. i think one of 'em went through my gums and jaw straight into my ear.

3:25... waiting for the procedure... what no radio? this is a doctors office and i have to sit in silence? i set up a game plan in my mind: during the events relating to the extraction of tooth i will recite Super Bowl I-XL winners and MVP's. This will no doubt take my mind off the misery that will ensue.

3:30... time has come... Dr. Johnson says do you feel pressure or pain? what's the difference? like a man on a mission he begins... "wait, i need time to start reciting my Super Bowl stats... ah forget it..." i close my eyes and break out into a full body sweat."

3:32... dental assistant tells me to relax my cheek. easy for her to say.

3:37... after hearing god-awful noises - the events are complete. i ask to see the tooth... it broke into a couple of pieces. it is nasty looking. i ask if i can have it (to sell on eBay). they say they want to keep it for scientific purposes.

3:45... puffy cheek and all - i leave the place - $199 lighter in the wallet. 1 less tooth to brush. sweet.

6:15... novacaine wears off... first signs of real pain. luckily 800 mg of Advil does the trick. my perscription for Vicoden remains unclaimed. i didn't want to take it if i didn't have to.

The End.

oh, i survived, by the way.

note to self

why is it that emergencies always happen on the weekend.
chalk this one up in the stupidity department.

it all started nearly 2 years ago on my birthday. I chiped a wisdom tooth on a crouton of all things. well over the past 22 months, said wisdom tooth has been in the slow process of decaying away. yeah, gross.

last week, the night before Thanksgiving, said tooth sent sharp, pulsating pain up and down the left side of my jaw. I woke up the next morn to no such pain.

then, 2 days ago, while watching Grey's Anatomy said tooth again sent pulsating pain from ear to chin. I just thought ye ole tooth was updet that Dr. Burke and Dr. Yang weren't going to be punished for their err in judgement. i woke up Friday morning to no pain, so i proceeded on with my day - with intentions to call Dr. Sales. I went out of town for a meeting in Wooster. By the time i returned - it was after 4pm... i called and the office was closed. no biggie... i wasn't feeling any pain.

and thus you know what happened next - almost immidiately the pain returned and i swear the tooth in question has moved - to the point that i really can't put my teeth together - top and bottom - on the left side of my mouth.

i was able to get to sleep last nite - but am still in a lot of pain. fun fun. now i am plotting my next move. and of course - it's a weekend.

oh well. i swear some of these things happen to me only so that i will have an interesting story to tell to my grandkids about the importance of flossing.

Firefox

it dawned on me today that my blog doesn't look the way i think it looks - that is if people are viewing it in Internet Explorer.

i use FIREFOX - which, i might add is so much better than IE.

here is irony for you: the new IE7 just came out... well someone at firefox bought the url to www.ie7.com

go there and then click on the firefox link and download Mozilla Firefox now!

Rain Down

rain down your love on us
rain down your greatness
rain down your love on us
rain down your peace









a gentle rain fell this morning.
it was pleasing to my soul.

blank

feeling blank.
empty.
trying to find
the truth within.
God is speaking.
am i listening? processing?
to lazy to formulate...
because it takes work.
and then the Lord spoke...
and i listened...
and this is how i responded...










circle me o God
let your arms enfold me

circle me o God
let your love surround.

circle me o God
let your light shine brightly.

circle me, circle me o God.

circle me o God
when i'm weak and weary.

circle me o God
when despair is near.

circle me o God
let your peace surround me.

circle me, circle me o God.

circle me o God
when i'm tired and restless.

circle me o God
be my hope, my strength.

circle me o God
let your presence guide me.

circle me, circle me o God.









LISTENING TO: Jeff Johnson - A Thin Silence.

black friday

never again. well, at least not until next year.

so i decided to venture out into the crisp, fogging morning air to wait in line for the new Nintendo Wii gaming system.

i arrived @ Best Buy first but the line was at least a quarter of a mile long... i'd guess maybe 4 or 5,000 people waiting... oh and it was 3:45 am... so from there i went across the parking lot to an EB Games store. i was # 14 in line but the word from a friend of an employee was that only 9 were available. from there i drove over to the Target/Kohl's complex to a Game Stop. I was 12th in line there. Word was there were 20 available here, so i was feeling pretty good. i waited outside in 20 degree temperatures until 6:15 when a Game Stop employee showed up. He came out and told us that only 5 were available. but hey, my time wasn't a total waste. i got to here all about the guy beside me and how he met his wife online and moved here from California. he once waited in line all night for AC/DC Back in Black concert tickets in 1980.

shame on me for buying into the mindset of American consumerism. pun inteneded.

no man is an island (a.k.a. the journey to the end of the peer or how random life lived out leads to direction if ones eyes are opened to the light)

the journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.

what if that one step is off the end of a short peer?

about a month ago i got a new chair for my office. rather than thinking it through, i purchased the cheapest office chair available. not realizing that a good part of every day would be spent in such a chair - i was nothing short of disappointed upon using said chair that next day. i skimped out on the most important aspect a chair: comfort.

but maybe comfort shouldn't always be priority #1 in my life. secondly, i had 100% faith that the chair would do what it was supposed to do, i.e. hold me up as i sat on it - yet i was not satisfied because i wasn't comfortable.

this past weekend, the theme of journey kept invading my soul, my heart + my mind. even as i write this, i am not entirely sure what that means, but i am running with the idea. i think at some level we are all on a journey. for those of us who follow The Way (the teachings and example of Christ) - our journey is one to the cross... a journey of sacrifice and service with a dab of humility and empathy mixed in. this makes our journey a bit uncomfortable. for others who do not yet follow The One, Jesus Christ - they are on a journey as well - a journey to find fulfillment and purpose and peace, love + understanding. so we all travel the road, walking beside each other, seeking + searching. Some follow the map - some wander astray. all of us are uncomfortable... except for those who have taken a rest or have settled or are content.

i heard a quote from an 80 year old man once. He was a lifelong follower of Jesus. He said "i'm committed to a long walk in the right direction." for me, i can't help but think that my long walk has just taken me off a short peer. like Peter - i struggle to have faith - not enough faith - you either have it or you don't. do i have the faith in Jesus - believing that He is who He says He is? Faith that He is the Way, Truth + Life - and the only one who gets me to the Father in heaven (John 14:6)... or is it more of a question of 'do i have enough faith in myself'- faith to walk like Jesus (1 John 2:6) - to be like Him, to live like Him, to lead + disciple others like Him? that is the faith question that is invading me along this new part of my journey.

there was a long process of becoming a Rabbi - back in Jesus' day. a certain number of tests and skills needed to be mastered before you could be taken on. when chosen, an apprentice of a Rabbi would follow their teacher - striving to learn all that there was to learn from that wise Rabbi whom they had been placed with - they would literally take on dust and dirt from the Rabbi leading them that their cloaks and tunics would be covered and stained. in order to be like the Rabbi and learn from the Rabbi you would have to get dirty. The journey of a disciple is much the same. Only the disciples of Jesus were the Rabbi Apprentice rejects. They were fisherman and tax collectors... men who had to take on their father's trade. Yet Jesus comes along and calls them. They were not equipped for the journey that was ahead of them. Jesus doesn't call the equipped though - he equips those he calls.

the journey of a disciple is dirty and long and difficult and uncomfortable. their first step was off a short peer. it was sink or swim. but it was that which was uncomfortable for them that made them prepared to face the persecution and (eventually) understand the signs and wonders of Christ. Jesus did not spoon feed. There was no milk from the breast - it was meat and potatoes. their journey with Jesus prepared them for kingdom greatness and glory (Acts 2)... and the glory went to God, not man.

i am now realizing that i am on a journey with Christ. on this journey new things are being revealed. new passions are being placed within my heart + mind. discipline + discipleship are the keys i have been handed. creativity is the tool. now its time to teach others and to invite them to journey with me. it's time to get dirty... to get wet... to get uncomfortable... again... and again... for the sake of Christ - so that others may experience His glory + love.


the JOURNEY is

discipline................+.............discipleship

cre8tivity is the tool.

"come with" - Jesus.

Factors of the Seven: Answering the Call

Tomorrow marks Seven years. It's an anniversary of sorts of the day in which I followed the leading of Christ - past opportunites and doors opened by some, later closed by me and eventually towards a rare chance at a career changed pre-ordained by God. On November 15th, 1999 I was interviewed and hired on the spot as Director of Youth Ministries at Christ UMC.

The story actually can be traced back a few months prior. I pastor friend of mine - a man whom I truly trusted, had continually prodded me and joked with me about when the time was going to be right for me to enter the ministry. It was in August of that year when Pastor Mike asked me to take the job of Youth Director at his church. I prayerfully considered it... but eventually turned it down. It just didn't feel right. During the months after that, another pastor friend of mine (my former Youth Pastor, Bubba) had shared with me a few words of wisdom and guidance. Little did i even realize that God was speaking to me through them - preparing the way for a calling that was building within my heart.

It was through those two men and through other doors that opened that I finally stepped on through with faith in my heart and answered the call. Seven years have now come and gone and I am still in awe at how God has used me, is using me and will use me in the time to come.

Seven years have come and gone. Where will he lead me next? I have a genuine passion for youth ministry. I am always anticipating the journey that lies ahead. Thank you Jesus.

Seven strong.

And i can still hear the last words that my grandfather ever shared with me, just over 10 years ago - in August of '96... He asked me, with tears in his eyes "Tim, when are you going to enter the ministry?" He knew something. It may have taken me 3 years after that conversation to figure it out for myself, but my way was being prepared. The path was being made known to me. I strive to continue to walk the straight and narrow for narrow is the path that leads to righteousness.

mii

i am me.

i like who i am. i like being myself... being original.... in my own way.


{sigh}



change
challenge
connection

patterns

patterns.

we have many in our lives... some good... some not so good.
patterns of behavior. structure for daily living.
habits form quickly. although the bad ones seem to form quicker.

i think we all get to a point in our lives where we desire change... we desire standing out... we desire a faith lived out boldly, courageously and lovingly.

that is the pattern i strive to obtain. i want the pattern of Christ to be plastered across my chest. no appologies.

what patterns are you wearing?