Wednesday, December 06, 2006

extraction

bottom left wisdom tooth (i.e. #17) has left the building.

i only had to get one wisdom tooth removed - not that there is any less pain or anything. but it is out - and i am left with an empty feeling, lots of swelling and a jaw that still can hardly open.

a brief history of how said events went down:

Feb 2, 2005: Tim chips a tooth on a crouton at the Golden Corral while celebrating a birthday meal with the in-laws.

August 2005: Tooth hurts. Tim buys Ambesol.

Feb 2, 2006: Tim celebrates another birthday and the one year anniversary of chipping #17.

June 2006: Tooth hurts "real bad"

July 2006: Pain disipates.

Day before Thanksgiving 2006: Tim wakes up in the middle of the night in extreme pain. Jen says "have you given birth to two children? You don't know pain." Rolls over and goes to sleep.

Nov 30, 2006: Tim gets ner a wink of sleep... sez he'll call dentist in morning if tooth pain persists.

Dec 1, 2006: Pain subsizes. Tim goes to Wooster.

Dec 2, 2006: worst.pain.ever. its a Saturday. what dentist is open on a Saturday... during Christmas shopping season? Nadda. Calls dentists emergency number... ordered to take 800mg of Advil. Appointment set for Monday @ Noon.

Dec 4, 2006: Tim sees an old friend from high school at dentists office. is greeted with a smile. Gets in the chair. Dr. Sales falls off his when he sees the work of art that is #17.

Dec 4, 2006: 3pm appointment with Dr. Johnson, Oral Surgeon - to get #17 removed from the premisis.

3:15... three needles of novacaine. ouch. i think one of 'em went through my gums and jaw straight into my ear.

3:25... waiting for the procedure... what no radio? this is a doctors office and i have to sit in silence? i set up a game plan in my mind: during the events relating to the extraction of tooth i will recite Super Bowl I-XL winners and MVP's. This will no doubt take my mind off the misery that will ensue.

3:30... time has come... Dr. Johnson says do you feel pressure or pain? what's the difference? like a man on a mission he begins... "wait, i need time to start reciting my Super Bowl stats... ah forget it..." i close my eyes and break out into a full body sweat."

3:32... dental assistant tells me to relax my cheek. easy for her to say.

3:37... after hearing god-awful noises - the events are complete. i ask to see the tooth... it broke into a couple of pieces. it is nasty looking. i ask if i can have it (to sell on eBay). they say they want to keep it for scientific purposes.

3:45... puffy cheek and all - i leave the place - $199 lighter in the wallet. 1 less tooth to brush. sweet.

6:15... novacaine wears off... first signs of real pain. luckily 800 mg of Advil does the trick. my perscription for Vicoden remains unclaimed. i didn't want to take it if i didn't have to.

The End.

oh, i survived, by the way.

3 comments:

Bryan & Robin Kandel said...

So glad to hear that you survived and are on the road to recovery - I pray for your sake that it goes much better than mine did!! But wow, impressive only going in under local anesthesia . . . I didn't want to hear or feel anything :) hope you're feeling ok, and whenever you want to try the video chat, we're up for it (as long as we're online, of course).

Anonymous said...

so glad it is out chippy. hope you continue to heal. love ya

tegan said...

I have phobias of dentist and reading this gave me that horrible feeling I am dreading in January when they take my wisdom teeth out. eek. No way they will be getting to them with a local though. Glad you aren't in pain anymore, tooth pain definately isn't fun, especially when it's around the holidays!